


Dichotomy

by Kantayra



Category: Gargoyles
Genre: Gen, Humor
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2010-12-26
Updated: 2010-12-26
Packaged: 2017-10-14 03:19:16
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 656
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/144775
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kantayra/pseuds/Kantayra
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Owen and Puck sometimes have clashes of personality, inhabiting the same body.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Dichotomy

**Author's Note:**

  * For [brokengravity](https://archiveofourown.org/users/brokengravity/gifts).



Before what Owen Burnett dubbed “the merger” and the Puck referred to as “that windbag Oberon’s hissy-fit,” the dichotomy of having two such contrasting personalities in the same body hadn’t been an issue. True, they _were_ technically the same person. But the genius of Owen was that he wasn’t just Puck playing a role; he _was_ his own person. It had been hilarious at the time Puck had thought of it. Now, it was causing all sorts of problems.

***

For example, one morning Owen woke up long before the crack of dawn and began to prepare breakfast, only to have a mischievous voice whisper in ear:

“Why not replace dear old Davie’s double latte with non-Folgers’ crystals this morning? It’ll be a hoot.”

Owen pointedly ignored the comment and proceeded to make his employer’s regular morning affectation in the French press. But Owen could tell it was going to be one of _those_ days.

***

“You know what would be fun?” the Puck intervened as Owen was tidying the study. “Trade out that expensive chess board of Foxy’s for checkers. How long do you think it would take her to notice?”

 _Stop it_ , Owen scolded mentally and turned on the vacuum.

***

“Why not write up the financial report today in Pig Latin?” Puck chimed in while Owen was in his office later. “How much you wanna bet half the executives won’t be able to figure it out?”

 _That would be unprofessional_ , Owen insisted. _And they do all have Ivy League degrees, you know._

“Point proven,” Puck sounded far too amused.

***

By dinner, Owen was becoming rather peeved.

“Make teeny-weenies!” Puck crowed.

 _No._

“Five-dollar footlongs?”

 _NO._

“Pig in a poke?”

 _Knock it off!_

“Well, you pick, then. Something phallic. You _know_ you enjoy the constipated look on Goliath’s face.”

Owen didn’t make anything remotely phallic for supper. But he didn’t deny that last part, either.

***

By the time Owen settled Alexander in to bed, Puck seemed to be growing irritated, as well.

“Come on, let me out to play!”

 _With the way you’re behaving today? Unlikely._

“I want to teach Alex something fun.”

 _Does ‘something fun’ consist of transfiguring Hudson’s knife into a flesh-eating banana again?_

There was a long, pointed pause.

“You’re no fun,” Puck finally grumbled.

***

“This is the song that never ends!” Puck had resorted to a rousing, continual chorus when Owen hadn’t caved into any of his demands all day.

“Have the presentation ready for the stockholder meeting at three,” Xanatos said.

Owen was having a very difficult time typing what Xanatos said, rather than what Puck said, into his Blackberry.

“It just keeps going on and on, my friend!”

“We’ll have to meet with accounting before next Friday—”

“Some people starting singing it, not knowing what it was!”

“—And we’ll need to have the conference room refurbished at—”

“And they’ll continue singing it forever just beca-a-a-ause!”

“—See if you can reschedule—”

“This is the song that never ends!”

“Oh, shut _up_ already!” Owen shouted out, finally unable to take it anymore.

In his head, Puck started snickering.

And that was when Owen noticed that Xanatos was staring at him in shocked disbelief.

“M-My apologies, sir,” Owen stammered out. “I didn’t realize I had spoken aloud, and…”

Puck’s snickering turned to outright hilarity at Owen’s fumbled apology. “Oh, I take it all back. _That_ was better than any of the other ideas I’ve had all day!”

 _I hate you_ , Owen remembered to grumble internally.

“Love you, too, smiley,” Puck announced before vanishing back into the reaches of Owen’s subconscious once more.

“I apologize again, sir,” Owen sighed. “The distraction has been dealt with.”

Xanatos gave him a serious look. “I’m glad to hear it. Now, shall we continue?”

“Please do.” Owen’s attention returned to his Blackberry.

“Take a message for me, then,” Xanatos smirked. “This is the song that never ends…”

Owen scowled at him. “I hate you _all_ ,” he amended his earlier sentiments.


End file.
